“I am 23 (24 on Friday!). I was born in Southport, Queensland and my family moved to Goonellabah when I was quite young. I’ve since gravitated around the Lismore region. I went to Richmond River high for most of my senior education. During that time I experienced a lot of bullying and my family was kind of falling apart… My mum and dad were arguing a lot.
I ended up meeting someone online who lived in Port Macquarie and at 16 I moved away from my home to live with him and his family. I enrolled myself in to Port Macquarie High School and completed year 11, then went to study at TAFE afterwards. I studied a Cert 2 in Early Childhood and a Cert 3 in Aged Care. Unfortunately being quite young and in my situation down there, I didn’t get to complete those courses.
My relationship with that partner ended. At the end of it we got a bit toxic for each other and he had quite significant mental health stuff. Eventually we made a mutual decision to part ways which was a nice way to end.
At that time I was couch surfing and homeless until a friend and their family took me in.
I ended up forming a relationship with my best friend from high school and that partner moved back up to Lismore with me. We have now been been together for 6 years.
When we returned I went back to Lismore TAFE to further my education and I completed a Cert 3 in Home and Community Care then went on to complete a Cert 4 in Community Services work. When I moved back my parents were at the end of the relationship and getting a divorce which was a tough time as my partner and I were living with them. I had to try and support my brother and sister while my life was falling apart in front of my eyes.
It was a really tough time in my life and I wasn’t coping. One of my friends at the time had just started getting support from Headspace Lismore and said it was a really fantastic organisation, so I decided to give it a try.
Headspace is the National youth mental health organisation and they support young people 12 – 25 with moderate mental health stuff. I met a youth access clinician and had a chat to them about what was going on for me. From there they referred me to Psychologist. The Psychologist I was seeing and I didn’t really mix well and I decided to change Psychologists. The cool thing was it was an easy process, no drama. I ended up finding one who really clicked with me and I suppose, gave the way for a bit of enlightenment and gave me some good skills to really help with my mental health.
I have depression and anxiety. The anxiety is a bit worse than the depression but they kind of mix together so if I’m anxious and not coping the depression kicks in. Even though I’m an advocate with Headspace I still experience my mental stuff day to day. It’s not something that magically goes away but Headspace have given me the skills to be able to cope and manage it in a positive and constructive way. Doing things like self care and looking after myself when I’m unwell.
I am a member of Headspace Lismore’s Youth Advisory group and what we do is advise Headspace on the most youth friendly way to produce their policies and procedures and also go out in the community and break the stigma surrounding mental health. Basically to put a youth friendly face to the youth organisation. For 3 years I have been working with the Youth Advisory group, Headspace to develop an event called Green Day. Green Day is primarily about fundraising for Headspace to have a peer support worker and to provide trainers for the youth advisory group to gain more skills in their advocate roles. Green Day is a day where we can all come together and conduct it around educating people about mental health in a positive way. It’s a recovery focus kind of day while raising funds and having a great day with the community. Tomorrow we will have young people talking about their experiences, live bands playing, a free BBQ and lots of activities. It starts at 3pm through to 6pm at the North end of Carrington Lane, Lismore. You’ll see the big Headspace sign.
I guess if I want to share something with people it would be that mental health isn’t just a thing that goes away. It takes a lot of work. I just want people to understand if they do access Headspace, they provide you with skills to help yourself. They’re not there to kind of fix things. Even though I’m a youth advocate in the community and the young people who are advocates on the youth advisory group, we may look really strong while we’re out in the community but we are also facing our own challenges day to day. People who suffer from mental healths stuff can appear resilient and strong. People can look really happy on the outside.
There was quote by Robin William where he said…’The happiest people often put themselves last to make the people around them happy’ when really they are suffering. It’s definitely beautiful for everyone to touch bases with friends and hold that healing space for their friends to come together and say.… You know what, I’m not ok! Rather than wanting to fix them, say.… It’s totally fine that you’re not Ok, I’m here for you.’ I think that’s the best healing platform, just holding that space for someone not to be ok.”