“I moved here when I was 6 from Sydney with my Grandparents, Uncles and my Mum. We always holidayed as a family in Ocean Shores so eventually we all loved it so much we moved up here. The first house was in Bangalow with a Maca farm.
I went to Bangalow Public and I never really fitted in until about Year 6. I was very introverted so I struggled to speak to people, I’m blind in one eye as well so for 8 years as a kid they would patch my good eye to try and train my bad eye to gain sight. That was the cause of a lot of bullying. I don’t know what happened but in Year 6 I decided to just get on with it and I made some friends.
I was born prematurely, 2 months early. I have terrible motor skills and my eye didn’t develop properly when I was in the womb. I was in ICU for 2 months and very tiny. I was pretty optimistic as a kid. My grandmother gave me tough love and I think that’s what helped me through the bullying.
My dad’s side of the family were really musical. My uncle would send me CD’s he made. It was exciting listening to him sing. I remember as a kid wanting to be famous, wanting to be an actress, then I started writing music. I didn’t have many friends so I’d get into creative writing. When I was 12 I wrote my first song properly. I wrote tons before that. My grandparents were like…You can sing! They started paying for music lessons which definitely built my courage up. I found a new way of expression so I felt like a different person. I could pretend I was someone else for that moment of performing.
I did my first public gig when I was 14 on the buskers stage at Splendour in the Grass. That was super exciting, nerve-racking but so much fun. I performed there again when I was 16. At that time I starting focusing more on my school work. People were saying ‘Music isn’t a real career, It’s a hobby…you need a good education.’ I tried to even it out. I studied and I was able to study music at school. I went to Trinity for 2 years then Byron for Year 9 then back to Trinity for the next 3 years. Year 7 and 8 were tough because I’d come from Bangalow where I had finally made lots of friends in Year 6 to Lismore. All my Year 6 friends went to Byron. I didn’t cope very well. I came into Byron with guns blazing and made lots of friends that year. I was getting caught up too much in the social side though rather than learning so I returned to Trinity and I found it much easier.
I kept busking and playing little gigs whenever I could. I had no production skills so most gigs were acoustic. In Year 10 we had an assignment to create a song. I already had so many songs so I was excited. The thing was I had to make it on a computer. I was always inspired by electronic music and I couldn’t get that from my guitar. I learnt how to produce this really simple thing on Logic. I put it on Soundcloud at the end of the year and Mike the guitarist from a local band called The Wharves contacted me after liking my project on Soundcloud. He offered to help me which was awesome. I went to work with him in the midst of Year 11.
During that time my Mum passed away suddenly. Mum had many issues. She had extreme Bi-Polar and depression. That’s why I lived with my grandparents and her. She lost her leg when I was about 13 due to having Diabetes from the age of 8. I remember as a kid being mad at my mum because she didn’t do all the things other mums did. It took me till I was about 15 to understand mental illness. By the time Mum passed away she’d suffered a heart attack, a stroke, kidney and liver disease and had her leg amputated.
She passed away 2 weeks after my 17th birthday and it was actually a shock. I woke up that morning excited to be going to my friends birthday. The night before I’d shown Mum what I bought my friend. I woke at 6am and Nanna came in saying she couldn’t wake Mum up. I went in….Come on Mum, wake up! But she’d gone. I’d always prepared myself all the times she’s been in hospital but I wasn’t prepared when it happened in the house. The night before she was happy because she wanted to get better. I had been studying so much for my Year 11 exams and I missed watching the Bachelor with her that night which is something we did together. She was only 39.
Losing Mum made me put a different perspective on everything. It changed my whole life. I remember the first time I set the table I put out 5 plates instead of 4. It’s those little things you don’t think about. I learnt that everyone grieves differently. So many people don’t grieve till years later, so many don’t want to talk about it, others need to talk about it.
I did my HSC, got an ATAR and graduated. I felt burnt out by the time I left school. My plan was to move to Melbourne for the music scene but that’s been put on hold due to Covid. I’ve worked at the Macadamia Castle for 3 years now and they’ve been so supportive. I work, go home and create music.
I’ve released 2 singles. The first was back in September. Mike and I produced that together and he’s still my Producer now. He lets me make complete creative decisions which is great. The new single, ‘How are you on my mind’ I just entered into a competition. I got a message from my Manager about it. It’s hosted by Tones and I. She wanted to help out the music community who can’t make a living from busking or gigs because of what’s happening. I put my song in, with a video and I sent it off. Two weeks later the comp started following me on Instagram. I waited patiently for 2 days and then I got a phone call from Tones herself which blew me away. She loved my song and said I made the finals. It’s an International comp and I got into the top 20 which is huge. I’ll let you know how I go.
I hope to release a new song soon which is very different to the other 2. I have a band patiently waiting for when we can gig. It’s really nice to be able to express myself through music. I want people to be inspired and not let other people’s judgement hold them back. People should do what they love.”