“We didn’t have children during that time. I remember when my daughter Kudra was born. Kudra’s Mum was also a forest activist. I met Kudra’s Mum when we were together at the blockades and we were together for a few years and decided to have who would become Kudra in 1997 which was lovely. That’s also when I began working in the University at SCU. One of the Lecturers there had been part of the campaign and she got me in as a research assistant. I already had my Law degree and I just took to teaching like a duck to water. I couldn’t believe that there was a job where they said, this is what we want you to do, just go and do it and don’t f#*k up. That to me was everything I didn’t have in the Law firm. I can’t do an 8 hour day. I can’t focus for that long. It kills me. I started as a casual in ’95 and eventually got a full time position in 2001. I then had to do my Masters in Law.
Another big life event happened. Kudra’s Mum Natalie unexpectedly died at 34 from a congenital heart condition that nobody knew she had when Kudra was four years old. It was a massive shock to the whole community and tribe. She was such a powerful, strong, healthy person. She was a musician and a teacher. She spoke multiple languages. The three of us were heading to the beach toward Little Wategos at the time and she was gone. It was very sudden and very karmic as the Doctor said… There was no what ifs? You couldn’t bargain with it. I’m forever grateful that Kudra and I were in the car so we got to see the whole thing. My approach to trauma is you need to walk all the way through it. You don’t leave unprocessed bits hanging around in the shadow forever. In that moment I knew that my life story just got written. Natalie and I had amiably separated some time earlier because we were both such big people but we were together on that day which was magic and beautiful. From then I did real single parenting, no week on, week off. I remember saying to a friend I used to go spear fishing…You know, it’s not just up to me whether I do life threatening things anymore. The journey for me and Kudra has been so beautiful. We are so close and she is so much like her Mum. She was greatly supported by the tribe and various Godmothers, particularly Sue Higginson.
I did get into another significant relationship with Danielle, the to be mother of my next child. She had a daughter Tahlia who didn’t have contact with her father and was the same age as Kudra so we sort of had a little ready made thing that went so well. We were amazing at working together and we moved to Townsville in 2003, changed Uni’s and I taught at Townsville. We bought a house though we were really trying to get to Cairns but Townsville was ok. I remember when we lived in Townsville which is a pretty straight culture but it’s also a very generous and salt of the earth culture, going to Woodford was like this therapy that you had to have. I never appreciated Woodford more than in the years I lived in Townsville. You’d go to Woodford and your heart would be filled with all the hippy shit because after I have to go back to BBQ’s and drinking beer (laughs). When you live here in the Northern Rivers, it’s like a long slow Woodford all year long.
I applied for a job that came up at the Law School in Vanuatu and one day after no contact at all an email arrived with an attachment offering me a full scale job offer in Port Vila. There were so many reasons not to go but I knew if I’d said no I would wonder about it forever. That fear of regret was too much so we went.
By now Emmagen had been born in 2004. So the other two girls are eight and we all go Vanuatu which was the most amazing experience. The girls went to Port Vila Public School and were some of the only white kids in the school. I went to teach at the university and I had students from 12 different pacific nations studying Law. It was a fascinating experience. We eventually bought our own bit of land, built a house and planted fruit trees that grew at this exceptional pace. We became accidentally self sufficient after about a year. I was only there for five years but we had every fruit hanging off the trees. It was incredible.
All land in Vanuatu is owned under Customary Law because it’s an independent Melanesian Republic. So we had a 99 year lease, learnt the language, drank Kava at the local Kava bars and it was such a great experience. I’ve always talked about the tribe and I believe that I’ve succeeded. These kids have got kids they grew up around but to also grow up in an intact tribal culture was also beautiful to watch. Everybody needs a village. Financially it wasn’t a great thing but it was the best experience. Eventually you realise you’re living on a rock. There was 160 kms of road on the entire island and I’m a bit of a rambler and a wanderer. Eventually that relationship buckled under the pressures so in 2011 I came back. Danielle and Talia stayed on for a few more years and Emmy came and went. I was lucky enough when I returned to land a job at Southern Cross Law School and as I said, I’m still there now.“